She tried to have sex with him but he quote unquote respected her
Ohh the wonderful, yet disgusting things she can do with her hair
So she said grabbing my cock was like holding a giant crayola from pre-school.
that was the beginning of the end.
There's an old bald Japanese dude on the metra next to me. He's drinking MGD on a crowded train, and rocking out way too hard to what may be the same Dallas Green song I'm listening to. Life is sweet.
Just saw a guy from Kansas and a guy from Nebraska arguing over who had less of an accent. God Bless the Midwest.
No I remember falling down the stairs I just don't remember it hurting.
did she really put a helmet on, try to make a hole in the wall then pass out on the floor ten minutes later? if thats true ill be there in 15
It's official, I need to start putting my vagina's needs before my own.
Really? I thought your parents stopped loving you when you drunkenly fell through the ceiling...
When I said I wanted you to make noise during sex, I didn't mean mocking ones.
Still trying to figure out where I was when someone broke the lawn chair and put it in the bathroom.
If someone plays phil collins i'm gonna take off my clothes
I have a sixth sense for large penises and lack of morals
I just spent 100$ at a sex shop to make myself feel better. And I signed you up to win 200$ so if you win, it's mine. And yes I'm serious.
Lessons learned from last night: do not leave me drunk and alone with strippers and a credit card. Let's do whatever's cheaper.
Randomize