I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
Every time I hang out with your gay friend, I have to make a checklist of words to look up when I get home. First Google of the night? "Power bottom."
No offense but you kinda look like a Jack Johnson fan in that pic
We just built a bong out of a pineapple. I am never leaving hawaii. Ever.
ive come to the point where weve hung out more times sober than drunk. i think im growing up. fuck.
Woke to a half burnt 20 in my pocket, covered in mud, clothes all wet, so im assuming I didn't use that 20 you gave me for a taxi
I packed spaghetti and rum. But panties? Nah
I have fireworks and redbull; let's make heart attack inducing magic happen.
Basically I don't wanna put on pants...but I'm stoked for drinking my face off tomorrow.
Come on there are only so many drink coaster sizes nipples in the world
Is it against health code to come into work half drunk and commando?
After we finished having sex, he drunkenly tried to hugh five me, farted, then accused me of stealing his socks.
how did i manage to wake up with my bra on backwards?
Bachelorette party buss just rolled into down town. DTF, "horny hotties inside" and "show us your dicks" written on the windows....this could get interesting.
I know she’s pissed I fucked her husband, but I didn’t know he was married until after I blew him at Legoland
Randomize
