is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
its freezing days like this when i seriously consider littering to speed up the global warming processes.
apparently, i ordered a pogo stick last night. i can't even be mad about that.
facebook friend requested him the morning after while he was still asleep in my bed, a whole new level of creeper even for me
He is offering to pay me back by sending me a dick pic.
.......................................
My thoughts exactly.
Don't park in the garage. I installed a stripper pole while drunk and it's kinda in the way
I may have broken a few toes and my face hurts. I do know that I pissed the bed so at least I've got some closure there
Theres a 75% chance I'm wearing a hocky mask and nothing else right now
Ps I am
Honestly, it's his loss. He went for the free sample when he could've gotten the whole package, babes.
does that make me the free sample at the grocery store he didn't like enough to buy...? yeah, that advice didn't help, but thanks.
New low reached: a cockroach has actually drowned itself in our dirty dishes. We are heathens. Cleaning dance party tonight. No excuses.
There's a Japanese guy here dressed as a Viking who just screamed "wats up cocksluts" and kicked a guy in the face. come get me out of here.
My mom just said "okay girls, the ONLY thing i ask is that you stay sober Saturday afternoon, until halfway through lunch. And you don't wear that crystal camo hat. This is a funeral, not a tailgate party"
Best wishes.
I have just received a gold-medal-deserving sext. He wrote me a fucking novel. Not only am I incredibly turned on but I am beyond impressed. He is the sext god. I must bow to him.
Listen all I know is that mistakes were made and she stole the car and drove half an hour for food at 4 am
Randomize
