I got fucking wesley sniped last night by that power hoe. How'd it end up on your end? Did you canoodle the stripper enough for her to agree to go to formal?
god, you should never be in the FBI. you'd give away america's secrets to any boy who asked.
Spider just rapelled from her vag rethinking online dating.
I kind of feel like guidos are mythical creatures.
I'm getting the same feeling waiting for the web-page to load that has my final grades that I get when I take a pregnancy test. I think I'm gonna leave my computer for 3 minutes.
College is just filling the gap until I get a rich girl pregnant
Shame should no longer be a word in your vocabulary.
He tried to cuddle with me after we hooked up and i just looked at him and said why are you still here?
and everything will be beautiful and nothing will hurt and we will eat nachos
Ever have those mornings where you just can't wait to puke in the shower?
Which genius got me a voicemail of myself puking?
They were loudly fucking last night and there was way too much conversation involved. It wasn't even dirty talk, it was more like "your doing it wrong" talk
i think you lost all your innocence when you were caught straddling a fence in your thong & cowboy boots by the 40 year old apartment manager
I'm having a funeral for my vibrator. Please be there. I need your dick for support.
Leaving the puke on the ceiling as a reminder.
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