next time dont tell jokes :) miss bonerkill
I wonder what it would be like to masturbate in space
you rearended a car with your bike and then puked all over his back windshield. They made BUI's for you.
I cant believe Lindsay Lohan feels like this every day
Found out that it IS actually possible to get road head from somebody in the back seat
I just pulled a handful of rice out of my pocket.
Even the bar was yelling boobs, so of course the shirt came off
On 3 separate occasions, she grabbed my bullhorn to announce to the entire party she had fucked me.
the potatoes in the margarita machine wasn't the breaking point. its when he turned on the stove and put a bunch of bottle rockets on it that i knew the night had prematurely failed
javelin tossed one of my crutches in to the mosh pit at the concert, hit some dude in the temple hahah fuck him he sucks
Why is the clock ticking so loud? Now I know how Captain Hook feels.
People will call it the Wrath of the Froyo. We'll be immortalized.
I don't know bro. If a girl makes you cum hard enough that you pull a back muscle, she might be the perfect one to call for a massage on said muscle.
I've seriously never been more thankful for marijuana and my resting bitchface.
Yeah, but i got vodka and bacon out of it, so it's fine.
Randomize
