guy in front of me on the bus did 12 yrs, hes teling me about how to knife fight
I'm surrounded by dudes and fupa's! No hot chicks...wtf!?
Medical industry, most hot chicks dont want to deal with blood + shit
The first sip always goes straight to my vagina.
the amount of blow i got, New years should last a week.
Sry I left before you woke up. The house was really fucked up and I didn't feel like helping you clean. PS Somebody threw up on your dog
it glows. i had to have it.
dude just did a line with screech. dude is fucking creepy
if creating a fake 8 year old brother, who lives with me and has had mono for the past month, to explain why I have ignored my group project members is wrong, then I... well then I'm probably going to hell
Do what? I was just saying that at some point there's a chance I'll have a boner. Think of it like a guessing game. "Does he have one now?"
Youll thank me when youre dead an dont have a cat eating your face
She got drunk on the air plane and pretended to be an elephant for an hour...Atleast the kid behind us enjoyed it.
Im invoking the "no judgements" clause of our friendship.
My god, what have you done?
Well I mean enduring a 45 minute conversation about C-sections was worth the 9 jello shots those soccer moms gave me.
I woke up with a dread of barbecue sauce in my hair. Drunk munchies makes me a disgusting person.
Where you at? Come home and endure this shit show called "The Second Presidential Debate".
Randomize
