we were pretty classy up until the second keg
Sarah Palin just got hired for Fox News. Watch out Jersey Shore... there's a new drinking game in town
just found his boxers balled up inside my tights, hidden in my freezer. damn i love college.
you spent 5 minutes trying to open an empty PBR and kept saying "don't worry i'll get it i've been working out"
I have your shoes, your bike, and someones blue underwear. Round 2 tonight?
Just wrestled a cop. He won my shorts. I won my freedom. In fishnets and army boots. still headed to the party. would appreciate pants, but not necessary.
I think I sprained my soul last night
By the way if you come home and I'm not wearing pants, just go with it. I didn't have the energy to go searching for some.
they knew we were both to shy to do anything so they got us drunk and locked us in the back yard with a tent. it was fuck or freeze
you have the best friends
Either she's trying to smother me and failing, or she just has a really bad sense of where her tits should go.
It will be like a scavenger hunt.. only we're looking for places to have sex.
Dude. He almost took three different girls home, all while dressed up as Amy Winehouse. If he goes as Kurt Cobain next weekend, we're screwed.
So i just remembered that thing i use to do with your butt because of shark week.
Sorry I missed your call earlier. I was getting high with my high school band teacher.
only 4 hours until nug lovin time
excuse me?
nug lovin. lovin nugs.
Randomize
