I'm talking handstands, sex in broad daylight, waking me up in the middle of the night. CRAZY
handstands? WTF?
she was a gymnast
go to hell.
Apparently throwing up on his dick didnt convince him to stay away . . . whats the most indirect way of saying "im just going to continue avoiding you"?
so i had a hang over on saturday and i stayed in the shower for 4 hours, then crawled out, skimpered to my bed, and some kid i didnt know was sleeping in it
So I drew a giant robot attacking a city on the chem test. My TA colored in the fire on the burning building
He threw up, and left his credit card next to the puddle. He kept on saying he wanted to pay for the damages.
I'm using her two yr old as a arm rest while I attempt to feel her up. Somehow she is allowing it. How this transitions to sex should be interesting.
So after he broke the crutches and got us kicked out of McDonalds, we stole a bike and when we got back to the hotel, he jumped out the window into the bushes.
Yeah when he is drunk, he seems to think he is Captain Americas Canadian counterpart, Captain Canuck
It was one of those nights where you get back from the bar and end up staying up till 3AM beating off to facebook photos of girls from college
I just threw in a dip with a guy that superglued his fake tooth back in today. My life is complete.
We peed on campus in the middle of the tailgate and then hit on a married cop that asked you to stop touching him
He snorted adderall on my table. I have a feeling he's not trying to buy me flowers
Seriously, he's as bad as Joffrey. I hope this ends like Game Of Thrones did.
Yeah it got awkward when the two guys we were playing beer pong against realized that I'd hooked up with both of them. Their teamwork declined after that.
when i woke up with rugburns on the tops of my feet, knees, and chin i was a little confused. and then i remembered i had sex with him in his friends walk in closet.
I could not add him. He gets 5 likes on Instagram.
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