I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
got weed?
I'm really tired of you accidentally texting me when your doing illegal things. I'm taking away your phone.
sorry mom...
The worst thing about having a parent with a prius is that they can walk in on you without any warning
Just saw a group of asian tourists in safari outifts bow in thanks to the starbucks guys. And no Im not high.
the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
would it be subtle enough if I played birthday sex on repeat while I may or may not be stripping?
If you see my mugshot on the news tomorrow, its not what you think
i swear i just dislocated a hip staying still
My "lord keep me from stabbing a bitch" prayer has gotten a lot of miles today
just called AAA to get my keys out of me car and then afterwards realized they were in my pocket...stoner life
I couldn't have possibly been that bad
You had her flip the penny over to the lucky side before you picked it up and ate it...
she squeaked mid orgaism. I laughed she cried
i just read a article called "Booze, Drugs, and Bipolar Disorder"... i think someone is writing the memoirs of my life
I blame her lesbian super powers of coercion.
Randomize
