There is a girl getting fingered on my left, a middle aged drink man smoking a bong and two girls flashing the cameras in front of me. I'm in the middle trying to maintain my innocence.
Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
Flirting with the rich sleazy owner of the club: 1 way ticket to free sushi, drinks, and VIP passes. FUck! im better with older men than i am with babies and dogs
Next weekend I am getting a library card and staying my whore ass home.
I have glitter on my penis. Do you know anything about this?
my mom walked in on me smoking weed alone, listening to the eagles, and just staring at the river. she totally knew.
There's a girl in front of me with a see through white shirt on and her back says I suck bad dick. Fun night hun?
I just rubbed my dick on something in your apartment. Can you guess what?
I just saw a dude sitting IN a bush, weeping and playing a harmonica. I hope your day is going better than his.
The cops showed up and one of them got pushed in the pool. When he got out he looked really sad so I got him a towel and hugged him. He arrested all the underage drunkards but me.
So, I have realized that I am kryptonite for married men. I'm not sure how to feel about this sober, but drunk me accepts her destiny.
I guess I just don't understand how the two main issues with your ex involve a cock ring and a Christmas tree
dude you pointed at my dad's crotch and said I'd tap that. I didn't even know you were gay.
I'm eating dinner with his parents and my phone goes "MOVE BITCH GET OUT THE WAY!" Thanks.
Randomize
