I did the walk of shame to another booty call
I don't think that should turn me on, but it does
Her boobs more than make up for all the flaws with her personality.
I just randomly started counting the number of guys that I've hooked up with that are now gay. 11.
Watching Blossom reruns on YouTube. Eating Pringles dipped in hot chocolate. Not taking this breakup well.
well if I unknowingly shoved my hand up someones ass, I'm glad it was yours
andd if someone unknowingly shoved their hand up my ass without me knowing, im glad it was you
Dude just walked down the street literally wearing nothing but a small box around his waist carrying a case of beer. I want to live here for the rest of my life.
As the night goes on these shots are getting so much easier. My liver jst needed a warmup lap.
Come get her ASAP. She's "people bowling," which is just her rolling into random groups of people. People look pissed.
We jumped on a random trolley because total strangers offered us free vodka. We're not even on the route map as far as I can tell. I see now how those people died in "Hostel"... we deserve whatever happens to us tonight.
Jake bring pizza.
JAKE BRING PIZZA.
i have officially banned the recreational use of bayonets.
I forced myself to puke in my garbage can, and the next day I bought a new one and burnt the old one. You could say it was a rough night
Any time you've had a failed relationship, I blast No Sex for Ben by The Rapture and dance around my room. I wish I was joking.
...blackout vacation is awesome. Where did you end up? I think i'm in Miami.
Hospital.
How drunk were you? in an effort to seduce him, you demonstrated your lap dance skillz on his dog.
Randomize
