so he came in my eye... should i throw out my contacts?
i might even pee on it at walmart i am so nervous
I'm gonna make this happen. You think it would be too forward to text him my room number with turn by turn directions straight to my crotch?
was it good sex?
i mean it was good for how drunk we were. and for how big the closet was
Been in the ER for 3 hours now. This hospitals transition to paperless is not going well. But my doctor looks like Elton John and just gave me percocet
I just saw a commercial for God of War and heard the nickname he gave my vagina.
I think you were giving a sex seminar on your kitchen table last night.
he has this weird thing where he watches me pee
I feel like my nipples were chewed on by alligators.
I'm high and reading a Wikipedia article on circumcision procedure. Help.
But how do I turn off the feelings though?
Vodka.
yyyea i think im gonna go get a bowl and play skyrim. And by bowl i mean something i can throw up in, not weed
I have chicken nuggets, lube and brand new batteries, he can stay at work charting all weekend for all I care, I'm set.
i also remember watching someone vomit off a balcony which was kind of grim
you blew the guy with all the harry potter paraphanelia didn't you
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