and then I told him he looked like the Gordon's Fisherman dude. I don't think he thought it was funny, because he 'forgot' to pay for my beer.
i live my life in a constant state of hangover.
I was found on the hood of someone elses car... Who would've thought there were 2 white nissans?
Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
Well I put her head right through the headboard. Thank god the room was under her name.
Joe decreed the livingroom and the hallway up to the burn mark his kingdom. I think this is the point of 'stage an intervention'
OHMYGOD did I try to use pinesol as a mixer?
We realized tonight that we have to get advice about guys from you because you're our only straight male friend that neither of us has slept with.
I feel like I'm going to get the reputation of being the girl who brings her dog with her to all her random hookups.
Because I was drunk or stoned for 4 days. I either made terrible decisions or none at all.
I'm just going to have crazy good sex with him until one of us developed feelings that works in the movies right?
Oh, that was the alley that I ate a pine cone in.
He went down on me to the national anthem being sung by Jordan sparks. It was very patriotic of him
Um..... I have taste. The only thing I am going to bedazzle is my vagina.
Want a bet? I'm a kinky and determined motherfucker with a libido that is not easily stopped
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