I think horse shit smells the best of all shits.
somehow you got everyone naked by playing strip rock paper scissors.
beer pong: waldo and ernie vs. bacon and eggs... i love halloween
They found an open window, climbed through and proceeded to arrest half the party. These campus cops are like fucking ninjas.
I'm not a creep or anything, just a lost soul looking for a good lay
Someone wrote Kyle's bitch on me too. I dont even know who Kyle is.
Guys, right now i need a picture of a squirrel, preferably with one of you guys but not necessary.
Tonight just feels like one of those I'm going to lose a shoe nights.
You guys can't keep having sex with them and cleaning their house! They're never going to take you seriously!
and that my friend is why you dont go in for an eye exam and drop 250 dollars on a pair of glasses after smoking a blunt
I wonder what blackout Alex would think of her?
probably "functioning vagina, must touch"
Question. There's no better feeling than clean shaven balls. Do girls get that too?
This is the fifth time tonight that girl has taken off my pants. Take me home. Now.
Sometimes a man just deserves to get woken up with a blowjob.
There might be a dead possum in your bed, your roomate is extremely distressed!
Randomize
