the reason why you were crawling on your hands and knees from room to room last night was because you thought the ceiling fans were chasing you...
that makes sense.
I get free beer too. Its called a vagina and its accepted everywhere like visa
Until he has ordered mozzarella sticks & beers at 2pm while wearing formal attire, then this is still my bar.
Can you still call it a wet dream if sandwiches were involved?
white shorts are a girls way of saying "im ready to fuck cuz its not my time of month"
Lost another pound. Switching from beer to hard liquor did this body good.
Advice for you. Never grate cheese on your counter then not cleanup the scraps, then have your bf over and endup having sex on the counter. Theres literally cheese melted in and around my ass.
Everyone else in class agrees the weed smell is coming from me
Might I also add after my boss threw up in the garbage can and yelled puking rally, he dougied, then told me I wasn't about that life.
i have never been so sexually frustrated as I am right now. I feel like dying...is death an option?
I should become her mentor. Get her life back together for her
You mean sponsor?
Note to self: don't try to shave your legs when sex-sore. You CANT reach, stop trying.
ditto.
about cumming, not toast
If he gets me coffee, cold or no I'll make him see Jesus with my mouth.
Wait is this place where the strippers are missing teeth and I think one is missing a thumb? Though I don't know how she would maneuver on the pole without a thumb. Pls advise.
Randomize
