remind me tomorrow that nothing happen between me and the guy who's shirt i'm wearing
my night went downhill once I lost my bikershorts. EAWSSSSYY ACCESS
70 feet underwater and I sharted my wetsuit, Tide pen won't clean this up.
I hate myself for knowing the words to party in the USA.
I woke up to him eating me out, listening to classical music.
That sucks. I just talked to a telemarketer for 15 minutes about CSI: Miami and weed.
Hungover like ... in bed with the Brita pitcher and a straw, only opening one eye at a time.
Dude. 21 days till I'm 21. It's the 21 day countdown. The 25 days of Christmas can suck my dick.
im still going. this is my new reality. also. dont take glowsticks in the bath. they explode. actually. do. it. its beautiful.
i dont think thats healthy man...
It took him 5 seconds to cum and then he wanted to hold my hand all night
In times of desperation, never...NEVER put green apple scented hand sanitizer on your vagina.
He wants to tie me naked and spread out on his table, press a vibrator to my clit and feed me ice cream.
That is my stoner wet dream!
So by "wait for me" do you think he meant "Don't have sex with random dentists?"
Conference sex doesn't count if the dentist doesn't know your name.
I need to show you how I feel about you by fucking you repeatedly.
I'm just too horny to handle empty house
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