From behind she looks like Richard Simmons
just prayed to lady gaga in hopes it will help me pass my fashion merchandising final...what is my life?
walking in back of a girl wearing booty shorts, a halter and a bracelet that says trainwreck. I don't get it. The first day of nice weather and all the whores come out, are they like hibernating bears or something?
Motor boating, judging by the amount of lipstick I found I would say between 6 to 8 times
he knocked over the vodka and juice...picks up the cup and says "yes", takes the last sip...doesnt even worry about the mess all over the floor and we continue having sex.
I'm really tired of your booty call eating my fruity pebbles.
I'm at about main and main street
It's four o'clock and my 60yo aunt's tits have already made an appearance and there is a dildo traveling around the room periodically assaulting family members. Strangely I am thankful.
Finally better. I had to use eye makeup remover to get the purple wine stains off my lips
Tell Taylor to rock on. Tell her she is so beautiful that the sun shines down on her face and shows her beauty. Tell her to live on, like Martin Luther King. He'll never die. He's living his dreams.
I think I fucked up my elbow when I tried to fight off the paramedics.
Welp just ran into my high school history teacher while buying a pregnancy test...there goes my veil of innocence in this town.
Oh god. Charles just fell off the bar. Didn't spill his drink. He's come so far..
It was great. We stayed up all night talking about objects he'd put in his theoretical vagina.
I think/hope James is drunk. He's standing in the front lawn loudly declaring "I AM a popsicle!" Over and over....
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