Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
omg, he ripped it...he ripped my vagina...best. night. ever.
I wish you got a notification every time someone masturbated to a Facebook picture of you...
I feel like royalty, that girl from last night had a vajazzled vag. Bucket list complete.
I guess I tried to spit on a homeless man on the walk home...Out. Of.Hand.
hey, haven't seen your testicles in a while...you 3 still alive?
I think I just wrote a poem about your penis but it was totally unintentional.
Yeah man i woke up and only had a Jimmy John's wrapper covering myself..
did the fire alarm go off at the party last night I kind of remember a fire alarm noise
omg omg i ripped it out of the ceiling omg
I can feel my pain tolerance has shot up right along with my libido
I swear to god, my hangover cure is a green tea and a 15 minute twerkout. works every time
So, just saw a lady hysterically sobbing in a Walmart at 3 AM. Someone's not having a happy mother's day.
I've sent two unsolicited tit pictures in less than 24 hours. I'm the female version of a fuckboy.
She was wearing a grass skirt and a watermelon bra. WATERMELONS.
you're now officially the 3000 mile booty call. congrats.
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