Only in Alabama do they play hymns in a bar!!!
No, drunk sperm still make babies.
just found more coke in my pocket. i love not washing my jeans after every individual use.
I'm watching this guy on intervention hospitalized for liver damage. He's drinking the hand sanitizer in the hospital room. Say hello to your future.
She said that I needed to "pregame her so it can slip right in."
nothing like walking down the street with a garbage bag of puke trying to find a dumpster
Tried to make out with a statue, turns out it was a person.
I am dressed. And we didn't do anything. He's gorgeous and tall tho. Something nice to look at when I'm hungover
Beer and cheesecake and spinning in cirlcles why did you let me do this to myself
On a scale of 1-10 how seriously are we considering being sugar babies?
I'm about a 7.95
That sad moment when you flush your Molly down the toilet at the airport & watch your vacation slowly end..
She is the epitome of a puke & rally. She picked a random hott guy at the bar & made him pinky promise not to leave while she took a power nap. She went & passed out in her friends car & apparently puked just outside the bar. She stumbled in & found the randome guy again & claimed she was golden. Made it to the after party & stayed up til 6 doing body shots off every girl she saw & hooked up with the random from the bar. I love her life
just got home to find my brothers naked on the floor covered in chocolate. i am now nervous about sleeping in the same room as them
i'm 99% sure they had an orgy while i was passed out
Somehow I don't think offering me edibles is what dad meant by checking in on me
They're the hard candy kind!
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