In retrospect, pretending to punch a 9 year old girl in the face was a terrible analogy to use in a piano lesson.
When I asked if she spit or swallow she replied "I never learned how to spit"
I just figured you know how to drive a boat and I know how to get drunk. What can go wrong
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
Btw, whenever you feel discouraged about your life, think about me being frantically upset bc my mobile porn site limited me to only 5 videos a day
You should be glad you didn't come with last night. I watched pirate porn for the first time in my life as the 9th wheel.
You are going to come home to a suitcase in the fridge. Just go with it.
My genitals don't want beer. They want to not feel like they wandered into a hornet's nest.
I hope you get a lego stuck in your dickhole
But you put your finger in my ass and the rest is history
See, this is why we give you shit. Ashley gets her car cleaned out, I get multiple enchiladas made, and you get cum in your eye.
Lo siento on account of my penis...
i found 4 slices of pizza in my toaster, and a can of unopened soup in my blender.. wtf?
I swear I have some evil slut demon in me when I'm blacked out
Don't we all.
Are you coming over for scrambled eggs and hand jobs?
Randomize
