id be glad to
Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
Yeah he kicked my ass... He probably wouldnt have hit me as hard though if I wasnt lauging and yelling " I fucked your sister I fucked your sister" over and over again.
I didnt realize we were having a competition in poor decision making skills
how else could I explain the last few years
When else am I ever going to have a chance to do lines with T-Pain?
Just woke up bloody and clutching a rear view mirror I'm pretty sure is from my car. For those of you keeping score at home this is why I stopped drinking four loko.
You know it was a good weekend when; you leave a bi-lingual letter of apology on top of a stack of cash for hotel housekeeping.
well I already know I'm going to hell, at this point it's really go big or go home
Seriously how many times do I have to sleep with him before he stops calling me dude
I am going to buy some m-80's and keep a bucket of them in the bathroom. That way I can just depth charge the toilet before each time I use it. Lets see how those snakes like cheap Chinese explosives
All I've been thinking about for the past 12 hours is sex and SEAWORLD
And anyway at least being paid in opium makes a cool story
Just bought condoms with a walmart gift card. Thanks grandma.
In the morning when you read your texts, just fyi you showed up at my house drunk off your ass and shoe less and demanded I go to the bar. You need Jesus.
Bro I rebuilt the dungeon in animal crossing visit me
Broooo
Randomize
