Just gave my little brother the collection of clothes that boys have left in my room since I've been in college for his birthday.
why is there a clump of hair nailed to my wall?
Its funny how you denied every part of the text except " you hate fat ppl"
it felt like i was a kid in an empty playground. i fucked him on every piece of furniture in the house and then when his housemates showed up i was naked in his bed like i'd been there all along.
Nope. Daytime is texting time. Night time is you send me naked pictures time.
I think it's safe to say I'm rolling my hypothetical balls off
Apparently at 2 AM I decided to let the world know about my newfound love for elephants
Call me something sexy & ethnic. Like jasmine. But mystical too. Like Mermaid Jasmine. And throw Glitter somewhere in there too.
I deserve to be covered in dicks
The part of "Dave" will now be played by "Rob." Rob, why don't you unzip and show Dave why that is.
Clearly I'm trying to change the world one fuck at a time
you DO IT for the people
You act like tequila is some sort of sex juice
Just almost drowned myself in the shower again. I need an adult.
He just turned down phone sex for hockey and I'm so relieved I'm fucking a straight guy that I'm barely even mad
I assure you, it was not a Porn Hub Bee Movie parody.
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