I have a feeling we are going to become cougars together.
Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
I forgot to tell you. I'm at a porno shoot today.
im at a bar with my dad last night and he got hit on more that I did
I love having a vagina, its like having the keys to a city
The question of "Will I eat a piece of curried chicken off the floor?" has been answered tonight.
He wouldn't let me go down on him. He stopped me and told me he was a giver.
My meds have diminished my sex drive, this must be what regular women feel like
Was almost hungover and got scared, skipped hungover, back to hammered. Fuck real life
I feel like I should throw some tampons around my workspace so everyone will know what's really going on
It's still 8am.
Yeah, but its wine drunk. WITH A DOCTOR. THAT MAKES MY MORNING CLASSY.
Everyday this week I have woken up to a different dick pic. It's like a dick pic a day calendar!
For one week of my life every time I pull my cock out I want the Jurassic Park theme music to start playing.
because he's a firefighter, wouldn't sleeping with him be like saying thank you to the community?
I don't want to be flamboyant (says the guy who bought a hot pink suit to be a flamingo for Halloween)--but I don't mind being a little extra.
Randomize
