Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
he wants to bone in the snuggie
just jacked off with my ROTC uniform on. boy i feel like an american.
I've spent more money on drugs for bonnaroo than my actual ticket. Proudly.
gave him road head on the way to his grandparents house. purposely didn't let him finish, the sexual tension over turkey was indescribable.
I feel like my uterus is decaying in my body
she never specifically said NOT to fuck her boyfriend so technically we can still be best friends
Uh yeah. I ate a brick of cheese. Didn't even cut it. We were admiring the teeth marks I was leaving. We decided it was the negative of my mouth
EVERYONE IS SPEAKING SPANISH. I ONLY KNOW HOLA.
I've injured myself in such a way that i am only capable of making love standing up now
We are so blessed to to have nicely shaped vaginas
I thank god almighty everyday
Btw his name is Woody. I must be really drunk to think this is a good situation
Are you awake? I feel like I need to confess my sins to someone not on this side of the country.
it was a hallmark card with butt plugs.
I should buy myself lingerie for Valentine’s Day instead of a present for you because I am the present
Randomize
