I want to make a zoo with you.
This last weekend single handedly took me off the liver transplant list
theres a kid face down in the middle of campus... people are going about their day and paying no attention to him
Walked by a shop giving away free donuts this morning. Best walk of shame ever
looking at that huge scar on my leg from when i got drunk at 9 AM and walked into a grill. so excited for football season to start again!
Obviously you've never slept with someone who was deliverance level inbred.
I hope it's socially acceptable to wear a mesh one piece into last call tonight?
OH MY GOD I JUST WANT TO GO HOME AND FART ALL NIGHT.
Oh. My. God. Dad smoked a bowl. He's been playing cards...I just told a story and when I was done, he got really close to my face and very seriously asked me if he had cheese in his beard. I'm about to die.
You're lucky you got out when you did, about an hour later the girl in the Franzia box started wrestling everyone.
His dick is so big it could be an arm rest.
I feel like a pizza delivery girl of vagina tho
He's hot....knda sweaty, drunk smells like feet....but he's hung like a whale....so in other words totally your type
I thought we agreed to no sexting at the school bake sale...
If I don't answer right away it's because I took an Adderall and the fridge needs cleaned.
Randomize
