So I got hit on by a gay guy. It might have something to do with the fact that I licked his nose.
And why did you do that?
Tequila
Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
Ever since I discovered that youporn works on blackberry, my brickbreaker skills have gone to shit
Is it obsessive that I keep picking my crazy sex rug burn scab so it leaves a scar I can remember him by?
On the bright side, nobody died. Please bring me back my left shoe. I have work in an hour.
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
You stole a frozen pizza from the freezer, stuffed it in the back of your shirt then proceeded to leave the party.
I am unable to type or say "unprotected, receptive anal sex" with a straight face. clearly, HIV was a poor research paper topic choice.
I'm cheerleading for traffic. people are staring. Why am i the only high person on the way to class?
Dude, please wake him up, there are pills all over the floor and hes the only one who knows which ones to take simultaneously.
fuck your need to drink for whitney a thousand times last night.
my question is who was more confortable? You sleeping on the floor or me tweeting from a bush?
Just found out i over drew my checking account on a 711 hot dog
Do u remember buying that
I remember eating it on the curb like a drunken hobo
Its official... I need to stop being so slutty.. the guy I had sex with on friday delivered my jimmy johns tonight.
I fell asleep with a half eating burrito in my hand and woke up to cat vomit with burrito in it.
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