It was like a fairy tale, until he tried to put it in my ass...
Just kissed her with a dip in my mouth... She was either too drunk to notice or too cool to care
craigslist faux pas number 857, just got head in a disability bus.
she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
we were wasted and he didn't have a condom so he called the front desk and asked for one. They didn't "officially" have them but the night manager happened to have one in his wallet. He brought it to the room with two mints.
jungle juice + heels + stairs = broken arm
how can i incorporate a boy scout uniform into what i do tonight?
I hope so. I just start to question my lifestyle when i pee on coffee tables
I know i'm the slutty cousin, but be honest. have you ever got your nose ring caught on a guy's zipper?
His dick is longer than my foot and I'm a size 9. I'm literally kicking myself in the vagina
my taxi driver is listening to 50 shades of grey audiobook. this is uncomfortable.
So feel off my bed lastnight into the trashcan. On the plus side i thought under my bed was a cave and i went exsploring
She's going to hate me
Yeah well one of her many personalities always hates you.
The rest will just start to agree
This will never work. His dick is smaller than mine.
Wow. And yours is kind of small.
RIGHT?
If I hear the phrase 'these unprecedented times' one more time I'm putting my foot up someone's ass.
Randomize
