He was all up on my grill like I was having a BBQ. I DONT EVEN KNOW HOW TO USE A GRILL.
I am coming home for anal
* a nap*
i was unaware that anal sex sometimes ends with shit on the bed.
Helping high family members not look retarded is what family is for
giving him head while hes talking to his fiancee on the phone about inviting me to their wedding.... im invited. should i go or would that be wrong?
I feel like I should I write an apology note to the frat for falling down stairs, passing out on the couch, and chugging the entire bottle of burnetts at semiforml last weekend. Apparently I was the main topic of discussion at their chapter meeting last night.
We haven't even started dating yet but I already decided I'm going to cheat on her
THEY HAVE A VOMIT TROUGH.
What?
A TROUGH FOR VOMIT.
I took both his daughters virginities. There's no way he won't give me a job
this is probably the only time in my life that i would want to fuck thomas jefferson
So coach him. No guy wants to admit being unsure of something in bed. It's a man-law or something.
When a bartender remarks "wow" on how quickly you've finished a drink... Is that good or bad?
The only excuse this guy at the club had for trying to make out with me as soon as I met him was "I AM FROM MEXICOOO"
Its funny that for once I get home and I'm just as high as my parents are.
I live in Vegas It shouldn’t be this hard to find a penis looking for a night of no strings attached sex
Randomize