One girl and one boy is just not enough.
so all night Ive been that girl with her tits out @ the bar. I mean I dropped jaws, yo. But in a classy way.
Just saw a guy from Kansas and a guy from Nebraska arguing over who had less of an accent. God Bless the Midwest.
Working on an important paper into the wee hours of the morning, and every time I type the word "situation," I can't help but think of effing Jersey Shore. Those guidos are now ruining my academic life.
We were laying in the basement dry humping to the rhythm of the washing machine
She started crying and told me to leave half way through, I'm walking down main with a bottle of patron and a sweatpants boner.
this better not be you asking for a beej
The beer-amid has reached five feet. Caitlyn has a taser. GTG
Life Epiphany- I need to have children so I can be the drunk grandma at family functions. Its my destiny.
So the next three days will be henceforth known as the 'celebration of the end of the most irresponsible years of my life' be prepared to wake up naked in a ditch.
He was "hot guy in the dark". One of us had to sleep with him. I took the bullet you're welcome.
I'm so pissed theres no male strip clubs around where we are staying I looked extensively
It's 9:07 in the morning and I am so hungover right now I'm about to take the kids I'm babysitting to mf'ing Popeyes bc that's all I want in this world
slept with a 6'5 mountain man from Montana and then he played 'Girls Just Wanna Have Fun' on repeat..
Like wanna sit on your face while you speak German hot
Its not something you can force it it just has to happen like a rainbow or pooping
Randomize
