YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
sometimes i really wish you were a nugget.
Drinking in an igloo changes everything.
she's crying while babbling "all i do is win"
These eggs taste like chocolate chip cookies. This is the best hangover ever.
High Amy loves you. Sober Amy is unsure, but she's not here so fuck that bitch.
He sent me nudes and then a text asking if I tried the new Cantina Bowl from Taco Bell. He sure does romance right, doesn't he?
YOU CAN'T JUST ADD EVERYONE WHO ENTERS MY VAGINA ON FACEBOOK WTF
I didn't rip your fishnets, WE ripped your fishnets.
WHO TURNS DOWNA FRESHLY WAXED VAGINA IN A MAIDS COSTUME LITERALLY LAYING IN YOUR BED
I sharted in my christmas pjs :(
You just had sex during the movie Radio. This is an all time low
I think drunk me is trying to kill me.
Sitting in my junior high parking lot high on ambien talking to a stranger I met on tinder. What is life?
My one night stand from last weekend is now taking me on a date this weekend. How is this my life?
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