I think you should know he took my pants (buttons and zippers included) and my thong off with his mouth alone. I found my husband
Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
The girl I was getting head from just called my dick an anteater...I hate my parents for not cutting my cock tip off.
i feel like when youre not in my profile picture no one knows who i am.
Downside to Halloween: you can't tell if the guy dressed as Gene Simmons from KISS that keeps flirting with you is hot or not...I decided to err on the side of caution and assume not...
My mom just told me my dad shaves his pubes while drunk and I don't know how to feel anymore.
I told him I tried to eat a stranger's sandwich while I was drunk. Mildly disappointed but he realizes he has me for a kid.
I can't remember if I puked before or after the shots of absinthe. Or why I thought shots of absinthe was a good idea.
You yelled "Everybody!!! Round of applause to Jill for not doing anal!!" Right in front of him.
Strip club, what strip club did I eat a steak at? That's the appropriate question
I'm not trying to analyze you I'm just saying you are being unfair to soup
I don't care. We're going to fuck. And I WONT apologize in the morning. You cheated on me, so you can cheat on her with me.
Just calm down. My foot long super joint and I will be over shortly.
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
Legit hope my Trump humping Brother dies of this shit so I can stop pretending to still love him.
Randomize
