So my shaver died while I was trimming...ya know. And now it is half way done. I don't think there's currently any aesthetic in keeping it this way...
Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
her eyes looked like someone had poured fruit punch in them. needless to say we had a good time.
i just saw a girl w/ a shirt that said "im the single friend." yeah i bet u r. stop wearing shirts like that and that could change.
You asked me to be the big spoon, when you passed out on the stairs
I'm just gonna be the bigger person here and say I want you inside me
You don't forget tits like those, even if you are vegas drunk.
Can you explain to me why I woke up with my hands tied to the hotel bed with the phone cord???
The Deck is crawling with Cougars. Sound the irresponsibility alarm and come drink with me on a Tuesday night.
GLITTER SLIP N SLIDE MUTHAFUCKAH~
it's always good to have a friend that's a hairdresser, a massage therapist, maybe throw in a lawyer just in case, and always have a friend on food stamps
SUNS OUT COOCHY OUT
Right when he asked me if I was on birth control my dad walked in. This is my fate.
IT'S A GIANT FUCKING ROBOT, DUDE. LOGIC IS OUT OF THE QUESTION BECAUSE AWESOME.
I will fuck anyone who brings me mcdonalds right now
Randomize
