Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
ok i said sorry. what else do you want?
100 blowjobs
apparently 9 shots of absynthe does not take away your skill to walk. i just woke up under a tree in some field on the other side of town with 4 hours missing.
Is it weird I want to fuck the cartoon chick from e-surance??
Well his aunt was in the next room so we had to be quiet. I felt like i was on an episode of silent library.
still wasted. at home depot . just threw up in one of the demo showers. not okay.
Dude I need help. What word is complimentary, but sounds like "chunky"?
Let me start this apology by saying I'm sorry that I bit your penis.
Doing shrooms is fine until you get raped by curtains
I'm just saying; the box truck will cost less then dorms or rent, and we can always crash where the party is.
You showed your tits for hundreds of beads but magically became shy when there was food on the line
You are not going to get a pat on the back from me for not fucking that 40 year old again.
Ok: all ex-gfs except you from the last 5 years have or are about to have a baby...be on the lookout...
I wish so many great beards were not attached to even greater jerks. All that face sitting potential wasted. Some of the greatest tragedies of this century.
I might be a bit late, couldn't find my pants and had to go to the police station. Unrelated
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