Oh this totally just became legit. My "boss" is puking outside my car right now. I win again.
my hot student got the clitoris wrong on the lab practical...so it kinda makes me not want to pursue it
just because he can't find it on a cat, doesn't mean he can't find it on you
This is a mass text: my birthday is tomorrow, and I want a full day of birthday sex. Send me your availabities. Time slots begin at noon
I noticed how good my hair still looked. Apparently rum and coke in it helps it stay curly thru sex. May be using this more often.
Dont worry about getting me anything... Just put a bow on your ass.
Deal.
Just took last nights make up off with a sock. That hungover.
i would really love it if at least once per weekend i did not wake up to you half naked passed out on the floor
Returning my drunken purchases from last night. Not a single thing I bought was on sale.
Next Halloween I want us to dress up as jockeys, get drunk, and ride a carousel all night until we throw up or declare a winner
Hey, I'm off work. Wanna take a metric fuckton of adderall, possibly get daydrunk, and get my hair cut?
We can get high as fuck when there are no orders. If not its cool. I just figured Take Your Blunt Buddy To Work Day.
Haha never eat brownies from a guy with batman pajamas
seriously considering getting an electric blanket rather than sleeping with guys this winter for warmth.
Do not take the D yet, he needs to be worth it. Your Vagina is GOLD.
How do I let my trainer know I'm only at the gym so I can get in more intense sex positions?
Randomize