apparently i peed in my fridge last night because my vegetable drawer was filled with it.
Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
please remind me not to sleep with group members until after finals week.
I'm hard boiling eggs, drinking rum, and talking to my 8 year old brother about the 10's times tables. This is what thursday is all about.
You always know it is going to end badly when a guy asks if he met you at a "coed naked lawn bowling party"
I just want you to know how happy I am that you are circumcised.
You always have that cute deer in the headlights look. Thats what made showing you my penis for the first time so disconcerting.
Someone should make a valentines day card that says "I like the way you continuously consume thc with no concept of a limit other than drug supply" Because I'd send that to you.
I've never SEEN someone give negative fucks before. It's actually rather impressive. I want to study under them.
Tell me not to drink and get on ladders. I think I need the reminder.. I'm clumsy enough sober.
I'm laughing at the fact that I'm at Target right now buying vitamins and alcohol.
Until you've snorted cocaine at 6am before your nursing school clinicals birthing babies you're not on my level
You know those times when you're sitting down for a while and r like damn I'm sober but then stand up and r like WOAH HOLD UP.
I feel really sorry for my toilet right now
Randomize
