I just spent an hour correcting all the grammar and spelling of all the 2pac songs on my ipod
I made out with a deaf person. Also I've been drunk 11 days in a row now.
I asked him where the store BJ's was and he unzipped his pants.
im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.
highlight of my day: just saw a crying girl get dropped off at home wearing only socks, booty shorts, and a dirty wifebeeter. I wonder what happened to the costume...
It's not called being bisexual its called making out with anyone that has a mouth
i realized boys travel in groups of 3's and girls travel in 4's..thats why it gets so tricky
like hot dogs and buns.
I wouldn't take my shot so you poured it on my face. Twice.
my nipple ring is gone but someone was nice enough to replace it with a paperclip
Ugh why does it have to be margarita Monday. Why can't it be pants off dance off beer pong but with jager Monday.
He taped a champagne bottle to both his hands and called himself edward champagne hands. At one point he poured some on his lap and said " Just needed to make sure my dick got some too"
It's George Washington's Birthday. Can you not put on some red white and blue and get really drunk for the original Merican??
What procrastination leads to: I have submitted a third of my job applications this week with a BAC that would get me arrested
Apparently I was drunk enough to call he police station and ask if there was a problem with me.
He’s really fucking cute. Like, I want his penis in my mouth cute.
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