I want to have your abortion
If you could channel this insane talent for stalking you'd be a great weapon for this country. If you had a crush on Bin Ladin, guaranteed he'd be found, monitered and tagged within five days.
I just told my doc I would like to talk about my drinking problem, but that it would probably get in the way of my weekend plans.
Sometimes I think my vagina thinks its a penis.
She's mad at me cuz I told her having a fuck buddy was too much commitment.
Everybody was literally kung fu fighting
heey were did you guys go? last time i remember seeing you i was throwing up in the fountain
he kept asking me if i had been in a pool or a lake recently, i didnt want to say i know where the swimmers ear came from. shower sex.
EMERGENCY: IS A KAREOKE RICKROLL ACCEPTABLE IN THE YEAR 2011?
Come over, I want to eat cookie dough off your dick.
When the shrooms kicked in we both simultaneously realized we were not the right puzzle piece for the dubstep puzzle.
We made eye contact and were like we are not welcome here, the ravers are onto us and we need to get the fuck out before we get shuffled upon
Im gunna just be that one ballerina in the low V leopard thong leotard and everyone else can be boring and prude with their little pink tights on.
Are you drunk already?
Not already - at LAST.
Recliner chair sex has moments of worry....just don't.
wish he had known he had poison ivy on his cock beforehand... Is calamine okay to put on your vag?..
Randomize
