Words of Wisdom: ordering a pitcher of whiskey cokes, putting a straw in it, and calling it your drink is not socially acceptable
The duggars are the reason premarital sex is ok. Because if you don't have it until marriage you have no self control when it happens. And 19 kids.
yeah, and then after the convo was clearly over, my dad decides to scream "SIZE MATTERS" just to make things even more uncomfortable.
I just can't bring boyfriends home.
He told me about his girlfriends trust issues during our post sex spooning
We were squawking at each other for over an hour like chickens. Literally. Never touching the stuff again and never again showing my face at that Denny's.
I need to get a life, I am either crying at every glee episode or just wanting to blow rails off photos of us
There is a midget driving a powered tricycle around town. I am not drunk, stoned, or lying.
40s are totally the cure
Our first order of business as new roommates was to test the sex acoustics of our rooms. I need a new box spring.
Also he said my vagina was sculpted by gods so there must be some feelings here.
And two different second-graders said my make up was pretty. It's left over from last night bc I woke up 5 min before I was supposed to leave.
It was a glorious ass. He has amazing hands. I want to fuck him until he can't do math anymore.
Please tell me im imagining that i claimed that i was king of the ducks.
The amount of guys I've turned down for you is disgusting... You better love me.
Ahhh, beer. My second favorite breakfast drink.
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