So I had sex in the woods... it was just as dirty as you'd expect it would be.. and not in a good way.
he was persistant. I supposedly owe him a bj from high school.
my brother came home with a bottle of vodka and his pants off. were gonna spend more quality time together.
i'm pretty sure the only people calling it "sexting" are ones who don't actually do it
Ohmy god im about to fuxk my TA. i thyought this was a dream but i love you. <3
I was passed out on the dog bed yelling "I UNDERSTAND"
Some old truck driver just made me smell his beard I hope tonight turns out better
Its like the two hemispheres of my brain are in a death match but are two evenly matched for either side to win kinda drunk.
Want to run by the liquor store later? Tequila Youn should really be in attendance at Party Mountain. No one else could be our spirit animal.
It's definitively the wine. Every time I can drink and work I feel like I win at the game of life.
Last night all you did was whine about how you needed something new and exciting
Is THAT why I woke up with dreadlocks?
you never know what sharing a kayak could lead to
It's true
I wish drunk me came with subtitles
I only have sex with you to have a memory to masturbate to.
Can we skype so I'm not drinking alone?
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