it makes me cry that so many people are going to see you naked someday.
I've been deciding between brands of bagels for 20 minutes. This why I doint smoke weed.
only you would photoshop your dick
Just wrote a paper about alcohol abuse that sounded like my weekend...
he burped in my vagina and tried to deny it...
That's what happens when you park you car under a perfectly good balchony I can puke off of
I'm covered in sharpie and the girl next to me just said something smells like fried food. Hint: it's me. Why am I in class?
First of all, I don't like eggnog. Second of all too much rum is all bad. And thirdly I'm not there to sit in your lap and pretend you are Santa and I've been a bad girl.
Apparently I told the girl smoking was terrible for her, and then requested it in my mouth.
Had to belly crawl across the floor to the toilet with my eyes closed to puke my life out without making my hangover worse. Three times.
Ohhh,that's true. Babies are only fun when you're high. Otherwise, they're the worst kind of people.
By the way seagulls wings are very soft. And the lesbian and or by sexual twins say hello. Be home in the little bit time frame.
Mainly I just wanna pet bunnies. And purple chicks. Well any color chicks if I close my eyes. But purple if I open them.
I figured it out! There's blood on the kitchen floor because I fell into the dishwasher. And there's a face dent. And it doesn't work.
Yea.....I saw that happen.
He also sent me nipple clamps because romance is NOT dead
Randomize
