If we keep treating our bodies like amusement parks we have another 10 years left at best.
I understand Curling. That high.
So i literally just wrote sorry on my quiz and turned it in.
Had to awkwardly dig through all my fake ID's to get my real one so I could vote.......Model citizen over here.
I totally cried the whole time and then screamed out my new therapists name....
Was I really yelling "girls night" at random chicks before stealing and drinking all their shots?
You stuck a chicken finger in that stripper's clevage and said "Keep this warm for me.
Think I pulled my pelvic muscle.
I think I pulled my ashamed of myself muscle.
I am literally the only girl who can black out and wake up pantsless and STILL be 99% sure I didn't get any.
I dont know about you but I'm not getting out of bed this summer for anything but food or sex
You're telling me you've never sent a picture of your cock to a girl and then were all like "Oops, sorry, wrong person! By the way...You like?"
High with mom again. She's giving me relationship advice.
So my roommate and I have a written agreement stating that if he tries to sleep with his ex girlfriend, I have to immediately intervene and nut punch him then send her on her way.
this is the most serious roommate agreement ever
I'm beginning to think shitting his pants is just a normal thing for him.
My day so far: morning after pill and pancakes. Living the dream.
Randomize
