The bar is so dead the tender gave us free shots for staying. They mixed 2pac and phil collins. That's worth at least three shots.
He sat on a barstool and did the robot for 3 hours - I'm pretty sure he enjoyed himself.
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
What the fuck am I going to do with a pinata full of tampons?
Well if all fails we can always become surrogate mothers. I hear that pays well.
I'll offer my penis as collateral. You can hold title to it till I pay you back.
Before I left he insisted on serenading me with a ukalele. I might be a little bit in love
Huh. I think I went to highschool with the hooker my neighbor just brought home.
I'm eating my emotions. I am no longer interested in anybody other than my own hand and vagina.
Well its official, I'm into significantly freakier sex than even I thought possible.
I'm just opting for alcohol abuse, ramen and cuddling with my dog for now.
He started tongueing his parfait and told "thats what I'd to your ass" in the middle of Starbucks. Of course i brought him home
I didn't want to fight, I just wanted to tell you to fuckoff.
In other news, I tore a tendon in my hand from giving my boyfriend handjobs so that's how my day is going
She's throwing a party for a guy that just got out of rehab?
Randomize
