Literal conversation "you are ________ ____. you facebook friended me"
Mental picture: Us at a bar keeping it classy shot gunning PBR's in the corner.
That was a good example of when keeping it real goes right
He smothers me through text. I can't even image what he'd be like in person.
i just identified you from a description of your pipe
The waiter to-go cupped my bloody mary without me even asking. THAT hungover.
I kept pulling the $1 bills off the stage and told everyone "no no no she has to work for this money"
Just had a tranny complement my outfit. Looks like I'll have to change before we go out.
Come over we're celebrating the one month anniversary of her first 4/20
That's the last time I send a mass text invitation to smoke a blunt
Well, I washed his beard with dish soap and then I fucked him three times.
the dude in the apartments across the street got a video of me railing blake on your front steps last night
shit like this is why i dont let you drink vodka anymore ..
Bitch are you kidding? 2016 is gonna be the year our pussies run for president
Hey remind me the get the pancakes out of my jacket
learning about efficiency and effectiveness in an administration seminar. real world application: walking across the street to the pub on break to shotgun a beer.
That means I have to put pants on. That is not something I am willing to do right now.
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