They both told everyone they fell in a mud puddle
Oh they definetly fell in the mud, repeatedly, on top of each other
Eventually the creepy theater major quirks will come out. Probably in bed. Like role playing as the Phantom of the Opera
I turn the corner to find her walking in the front door in a tee-shirt, two different shoes and no pants. All she said to me was "I'm sad"
just tried googling 24 hr taco bell and when i typed "24 hour" it autocompleted with fitness. buzzzz killllll
Just sit in your kitchen floor until something speaks to you.
i have a wrist watched drawn on my wrist that it says shot o clock
Just stuffed an entire cupcake in my mouth after finishing third glass of wine. Valentines day is pretty much going how i expected it.
He had to carry me to the car. But then sat with me and waited for me to sober up enough to have sex. He's a keeper.
Getting drunk before noon on a Tuesday. When did this become my life? Did you know that a six-pack of Smirnoff is 2 liters?
And I told him that even though were not together, if he has sex with anyone I would have sex with someone else, video tape it and send it to him.
Went home last night with a guy in a tutu, didn't know he was wearing a tutu until he threw it at me in the bedroom. God I love Halloween.
I'm eating your cookies as payment for having to listen to you. Happy sex
Was looking through my phone and saw that drunk me took a tit pic in the Denny's bathroom..
I cannot handle Xanax... I just turned my computer on and I googled how to work YouTube
This morning we had sex while he was wearing a full length fur jacket and sunglasses... I wasn't even phased
Randomize
