I'm kindof freaked out about my cock not getting up this morning. Cove over later so I can sort this out. Do not post this on texts from last night.
Damn that would have been a great one. Hahah and don't worry...
We even fucked WHILE he was making me breakfast in bed.
I had a terrible day! The only thing that makes me feel better is knowing Jack Bauers day was worse.
I want to give my boyfriend great head for his birthday...can i practice on you?
That's ok. I found a crab leg in my bed and have no pants on.
Who faxed a picture of their penis to the office printer?!
Land Before Time marathon. we drink every time littlefoot almost eats a treestar.
Something's wrong. Everything's on fire. Unless it was like that before. Then everything's alright.
I just threw up all of my lunch in the Barnes & Nobles parking lot. Rockbottom tastes like a veggie burger, in case you were wondering.
He couldn't get his dick hard. So he started yelling at it. " EVERYONE is laughing at you, you piece of shit no wonder you can't get pussy" i wonder if that happens frequently I'll try again next weekend
I'm eating shredded cheese and chugging coke, until I can function again. I'm tingling everywhere
*jedi mind trick* you want to go down on me
He was gone when I woke up. But he left skid marks on my sheets and our unopened bottle of Titos is missing
New Rule: No more sleepovers with guys we met on Reddit
Yeah. I got a Tetnus shot then partied like it was 1999.
Pillow talk was a high five, this morning she made dinosaur muffins for the house. I love chapel hill
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