so explain again why im purple
no
I am dying of drunk and no thats not a typo.
I have a client coming in and there's a note that says she wants her hair to like Elisabeth Hasselback's from the view
that's Oklahoma for you
she made me cover her fishbowl with my shirt because she "didn't want to corrupt it."
Medical school killed my enjoyment of porn. Hard to keep a boner when you're diagnosing all the actor's STDs and skin disorders.
Thinking about bringing a vibrator to the tanning bed...kill two birds with one stone right?
Because the last time i saw or spoke to him he came all over me in a hammock.
Our logic class started an hour ago, I walked out and found my sister drunk, sitting down, eating m&ms, afraid to walk in... I want her life
I think you have the right to know, the water bottle you drank out of the other night is the bottle we use to catch what drips from the toilet. Love you!
Her vagina smelled like pancake batter. That's all you need to know.
Thats alot of pressure.
Just on your vagina. BTW I'm passing your house.
We joked about how funny it would be if he got pulled over with 300 breakfast burritos in hus car. We walk outside of the school just as the police lights turn on and pull him over
He got naked after doing the Ice Water Challenge and it was still enormous. So, yeah, I stayed over.
Is there a classy way to tell him that to thank him for his service I would like to put his dick in my mouth?
"Happy Veterans Day! Now pull down your pants."
My early Valentine's Day one night stand just took an uber home. Thank you, technology, for letting me enjoy this day in peace. 😍
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