my mouth tastes like poor choices
Having dinner with my dad, watching the news and some AIDS prevention ad comes on. My dad then kindly informs me that he doesn't enjoy the feel of condoms.
I just projectile vomited in a Methodist church parking lot. If Jesus didn't love me before he sure as hell doesn't now.
i've been thru my totinos phase. then after reading the ingredients and nutritional info i almost puked in my mouth. its like having the bastard child of pizza hut and mcdonalds invade your kitchen and start stabbing your digestive system.
Ill bet we could have atleast fucked a girl who fucked a guy who has fucked tara reid. That's a famous circle right?
I wish I could sell my textbooks directly to my drug dealer and cut out the middle man
I wanna throw up and cum in that order
Her eyebrows were plucked so thin that she had to have gonorrhea. Clean girls just don't pluck that way
Very impressive. My GPA is the same amount of orgasms I can offer tonight (valid only tonight): 3.5
You don't want any of I have. Seriously. Its 80 proof rum that was 8 bucks for a liter. I'm afraid
I'm sure your liver is writing out a will as we speak
lesson learned.. dressing up like a naughty teacher doesn't mean you can get away with spanking a cop with a ruler for being "fresh" with you
Well shit, I would've slept with him if I knew he was gonna be in the draft.
Come here I'm naked
And I want mozzarella sticks
HE'S LIKE A GREEK GOD BUT HE'S FROM BOSTON. HE'S A BOSTON GOD
pray to him
I WANNA PRAY ON HIS DICK
Fun. You missed it. Michael broke a door with his erection.
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