Btw I've read that book you bought me...And I'm such a bitch now
But I don't think guys love me
having sex with you is like teaching a dog to tango, it DOESN'T work
the best part about being a teacher is there are always 20 little kids around me to blame my farts on
no. you're not making a beach trip out of my abortion.
ARE YOU GOING TO SACRIFICE YOUR LIFE FOR MCDONALDS HASHRBOWNS
Between the hair pulling and the choking its its more like combat than sex
Sorry I have an "Operation Iraqi Freedom" fantasy
Dude you went around coming up behind people and whispering in their ears. I dont know what you said but they looked terrified when you left.
Look, the fact that I didn't kick him out and rip your clothes off speaks very highly of me.
He told me to come in and have some water before I drove home, my vagina didn't stand a chance escaping. We didn't even make it to the kitchen.
Haha, I gave you the rest of the cash I had on me and you bought 3 shots for yourself and beer for everybody except me FUCKFACE.
Watermelon juice. Makes everything better. Gin. Wine. EVERYTHING.
my head feels like a yellow yolk spinning in a circle at the bottom of the bowl.. i may have a concussion, love auto correct
We had sex while watching the republican debate. I'm not sure how he maintained an erection watching Donald Trump speak.
Pussy, Peanut Butter Cookies,and Bubble Wrap
You were yelling at them from the passenger seat saying you wanted your chicken for free because they couldn't prove it was from kentucky
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