boyfriend complimented me on my new prada shoes today. he is officially either gay or the man im gonna marry. knowing my luck it's all of the above.
wait one more day. tuesday is my official "i hit on you and/or we hooked up this weekend" friend request day.
I woke up tied to the door handle with reindeer patterned socks. You can tell it's Christmas.
Woke up in my own bed with a "New Years Eve 2011" bar bracelet on. Both of these things confuse me.
I may or may not have traded your body to the rodeo's owner for free beer.
The bet was for naked jumping jacks. And it back fired, she just laughed at all the slapping noise.
Ew. After that you just pretty much proved that your vagina is the reason why my vagina needs two toilet seat covers when peeing in public restrooms
This guy on the bus keeps leaning over and sniffing my hair.
You have amazing self restraint. If there was one thing I could learn from you, that wouldn't be it. I love my life as it is.
I just want a simple guy who likes cats, tattoos, and doing coke off my tits.
You walked in on us hooking up, hugged me, high fived him and unhooked my bra.. You claimed to be helping
you should probably call the Bronx Zoo in the morning to formally apologize
its the right thing to do
probably because i sent a bunch of guys a snap saying happy one year to my nipple piercings
Idk what's worse.... Yesterday not waking up in my bed or today waking up in the hello kitty gown.
Bachelorette party buss just rolled into down town. DTF, "horny hotties inside" and "show us your dicks" written on the windows....this could get interesting.
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