all of his pictures were taken on a library computer, how did you even consider fucking him?
if you want blown tonight you're gonna have to take me up on that offer now. in less then 45 minutes you're gonna be blacked out and i'm not doing something i'm not getting credit for in the morning.
regular news: took many shots of tequila.....bad news: woke up with a toothbrush and vagisil next to me.....good news: clean as a whistle
We tried to get a ride from the same firefigters that were turning off the fire alarm going off at our house.
he just voluntarily told me he was uncircumsized.. and that his favorite color was blue.
I woke up to him peeling the skin on my stomach from my sunburn. If he wasn't so good in bed I'd be a little freaked out.
Thanks for the Beyonce article. In other news, I just passed a man with the state of Florida tattooed on his face.
Are you going to eat tacos off the floor again?
Would seriously like to slash his tires but then I feel like I'd have to deal with him longer.
i mostly like you because you have a nice nose and that's an important trait to pass on to my future children
I just put on lipstick to sext him. That should tell you where my love life is at.
Sharknado 3 is going to bring us to alcoghol poisonign
Be careful, there is sex in the air.
when i saw him today i think my vagina did the equivalent of a stomach growl... its been to long
I keep worrying she's gonna have a repeat of the time the ceiling fan was talking in Chinese
Randomize
